UPDATE: MC HAMMER IS ALIVE

I repeat, MC HAMMER IS ALIVE

I was reacting to someone who tweeted he had died and I straight up did not look into it and I, like many, too easily accepted a world where he didn’t exist.

In honor of this, I present MC Hammer’s greatest moments (besides the song that has a fart sound at the beginning).

This is the ultimate self-own and he’s a real one for doing it. Also he will do the Hammer Time dance for Pepsi, Mattel, Lay’s (“you can’t touch this”), Taco Bell, KFC, Cheetos, ESPN, 3M Command Strips (“please, stop Hammer Time”), British Knights (with a tweaked “oh my word”), Castle Lite (“I told you, homeboy”), Cash4Gold (with Ed McMahon!), and Toshiba.

For the record, I was 100% all in on PSY back in the day. This collab with MC Hammer pushed it over the edge.

Here’s Hammer not fitting in with his fellow West Coast Hip-Hop All Stars like Eazy-E, Dr. Dre and Humpty Hump. (Somehow Humpty feels more normal here, I can’t explain it.)

But MC Hammer did not fuck around.

[reading teleprompter] “He’s a duck who answers to the name of Darkwing.”

The theme song to his reality show.

This isn’t exactly MC Hammer but it’s close.

Here’s a clip from the legendary Vh1 film, Too Legit, starring that guy from The 40-Year Old Virgin as MC Hammer and Ahmed Johnson as Suge Knight. This is the scene where they’re recording and filming…

…the greatest music video of all time, “Pumps and a Bump.” MC Hammer’s answer to gangsta rap. Tom Scharpling’s book has a great story how he pitched every indie rock band doing a shot-for-shot recreation of this and they all said no.

Also his gate reminds me of this perfect Simpsons bit: